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Lies, Damned Lies, and Internet Marketing Bullshit

I nearly fell out of my tree when I opened up this bullshit email from Internet Marketing “guru” Ryan Deiss this morning.

I’d like to take a couple of minutes of your time to explain why this type of bullshit marketing is so bad, and why you should avoid getting sucked in to it.

Here’s the start of Ryan’s bullshit email. What’s wrong with this picture?

ryan-deiss

It’s obvious what Ryan’s doing. You see this bullshit everywhere, in a huge variety of forms. But we can sum it up very easily…

The Promise of a Shortcut to Easy Gain

We’ve all got a built-in bullshit filter, which does a very important job: to raise a warning flag when someone’s trying to scam us.

However, we’ve also got built-in weaknesses, and the tendency to cheat our way to easy gain is one of them. That’s what these guys play on.

Let’s just start with the first line,

“Want a simple way to double your sales?”

Actually, before I carry on, I’d just like to get something off my chest. In fact, esteemed film director David Lynch says it so much better.

lynch2

Guys, Ryan is peddling you utter bullshit. You know, I’m sure that there’s probably some research that says one way to get round people’s bullshit filter is to make a lie that’s so incredible, while keeping a straight face, that the bullshit detector needle does a full three-sixty and the person ends up thinking, “That’s so incredible, it might just be true.”

And hey, I bet there are instances where you can take some bullshit marketing email funnel, and replace it with Ryan’s paint-by-numbers bullshit, and it will double sales. I bet that’s happened. And that’s why Ryan can manage to keep a straight face as he writes this bullshit.

But it’s still utter bullshit, total utter fucking BULLSHIT.

But it must be the kind of bullshit that makes some people curious enough to want to know more. People in a parallel market to these…

bigger-penis-ad one-weird-tip

Rationally, we all know this type of ad is bullshit. But it must stimulate enough of your “shortcut to easy gain” that people suspend their disbelief and click. Of course they’ll waste their money, but they won’t claim a refund and the scammer just moves on.

And Ryan’s claim is only marginally less scammy.

The next line just reinforces the “too good to be true” promise…

It’s easy… just copy and paste these three emails:

Really? Three emails that will magically work to double the sales of any business?! Excuse me for one second…

Bullshit!

Bull…
SHIT!!!

(Thank you. I feel a bit better now.)

Finally, it’s interesting to look at the document title in the image…

“Gain Logic Fear Followup Sequence.docx”

Isn’t that interesting?

  • Gain, i.e. promise
  • Logic, i.e. give reasons to make it sound believable
  • and Fear, i.e. prey on your victim’s emotions, particularly the fear of loss.

To be fair, those are actually valid marketing tactics, and may form part of any number of honest and effective campaigns.

But to say that you can double anyone’s sales, using fear… there’s only one word for that.

manipulation

I haven’t signed up for this, but I reckon I can tell you what Ryan’s “gift to you” is going to be.

It’s a taster of how to use emotional manipulation to push people’s weakness buttons so that you get them to pay you money.

Friend, that’s what these bullshit merchants do. They manipulate your emotions to get the contents of your wallet. They lie, keeping a straight face. They promise you easy gain, tricks, cheats, shortcuts. They make it sound easy, tickling that little bit of your brain that wants to believe there really is a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow, and that fairies live at the bottom of the garden.

But they’re lying. They really are.

And I’m sorry. Because guys like Ryan are in a position to make a real, positive difference in the world. But they just choose to leech money out of people by exploiting their weaknesses.

It doesn’t have to be that way. We can use the power of marketing to make the world a better place: by creating and selling products and services that really help people to have better, more fulfilling, healthier, happier lives; by delving deep and telling the truth; by being bold and courageous and giving ourselves a mission that inspires; and by telling a powerful story that will lift spirits and thoughts of a better future.

Not this bullshit. Not by manipulating. Ryan and friends, you don’t have to do this. Life is short, and it isn’t about how much fucking money you can screw out of people.

Updates, May 21 2015

If you look in the comments below, you’ll see that one of Ryan’s people commented, saying basically, “No, really, this stuff does work, honest.”

My response was that we should do a scientific test to prove it. We’ll send Ryan’s cookie-cutter email series out to half a list, promoting some product, and we’ll send three emails I wrote to the other half. If Ryan’s emails beat mine by 2:1, I’ll retract my argument, apologise, and become an ambassador for Ryan Deiss.

So far, there has been no response from the Digital Marketer crew. Big fucking surprise. They have everything to lose, and nothing to gain. Because they know deep down that cookie-cutter “solutions” are bullshit, designed solely to part people with their money.

I believe there are a few… no, scratch that…

I believe there are A LOT of entrepreneurs and marketers in the world who have integrity. Gary Vaynerchuk is one of them. Check out this short video. It’s under 3 minutes.

More Lies from Ryan, May 24 2015

Here’s a snippet from an email I got from Ryan today.

ryan-lie

I did a search in my email for the phrase “This Case Study won’t be up much longer” and found the exact same email from Ryan on September 29th, 2014.

So what’s happening here? Did Ryan forget to take down the case study? Unlikely.

The most probable answer is, Ryan knows that creating false urgency, by telling you to act now because the window is closing, will make you more likely to take action.

You see, everyone knows that scarcity and urgency are powerful stimuli for action.

However, if you have to LIE about it, then you’re treating your prospects with contempt, as though we’re idiots that it’s okay to manipulate.

Well, you know what Ryan, I don’t think it is okay to treat people like that. You know why? Because the truth will out, and integrity is not only more important than money, it’s wealth on a different level.

Here’s a crazy idea… Why don’t you use your intelligence, skills, and resources to create something genuinely massively useful — something that’s so great people will buy it without manipulation!

The tide is changing, friends, and it’s not too late to move away from the Dark Side. Join us, and let’s see what we can create together 🙂

jedi-symbol

What Others Are Saying About Ryan Deiss

I’m not the only person who’s getting sick of the profiteering and scamming out there masquerading as “marketing.”

For more insight into how the scamming sector operates, you may also check out the The Verge’s Scamworld movie below.

About the author

Ben Hunt

Ben has over 20 years' experience in web design and marketing, and is one of the most influential figures on the subject of effective web design. He has written a bunch of books and spoken at multiple conferences internationally. In 2015, Ben created Open-Source Marketing, which promises to turn the practice of marketing upside down.. Find out more at http://opensourcemarketingproject.org

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